Dear Son, On Your First Day At School

Your first day at school seemed to have passed by in a blur, just like the last four years. Someone hit the nail right on its head when they said , “the days are long but the years are short “. Time is indeed a magician. It tricks you into believing that something will last for a long time when in fact it melts away, without you knowing, blissfully ignorant. 

Coming back to your first day, I was a bag of nerves in anticipation of how you’d settle into big school, yes but also in anticipation of how I’d settle. A change to our routine, planning lunches, after school activities and so on. More importantly however, to help me cope with your absence during the time you will be away at school - learning, growing, becoming.

Whilst we waited at the school gate you asked me softly, “where’s my school bag?” and “what about lunch mummy?”. I explained to you then that you would be in school for just a couple of hours on the day so you needn’t worry. You seemed reassured by my words. 

Slowly, your class teacher beckoned students from her class to enter. When it was your turn, you marched in confidently, not looking back at me even once. I felt so proud of you at that moment that I was taken back to when you first held onto my fingers very firmly, to when you clung on to me innumerable nights in a row which I put down to teething or sleep regression and finally to when you embraced me so tightly in protest of settling into nursery. So somewhere along this path a brave little boy took shape, ready to conquer all of school’s adventures . 

I am so grateful for the staggered hours during your first week, I’m sure the school has done this more for the parents rather than children. 

I want to conclude this letter by sharing with you two poems - a haiku and an acrostic for September that I wrote to help me cope with everything. I do hope you like them!

School gates loom ahead 

You letting go of my hand

How did we get here?

So here we are, 

Enlightened yet reluctant to let go. 

Perhaps we just need to mimic nature.

The way the trees let go of their leaves

Ever so gently and the leaves fly away 

Making their way softly to rest upon the earth.

By letting go we learn to unlearn and 

Even the toughest of days become

Reminders that the way is always forward, however difficult the path. 

I wish your school days are filled with immense joy in the company of some beautiful friendships. 

Be curious, be kind.

Lots of love, 

Mummy